“No two persons ever read the same book.”
― Edmund Wilson

I guess, He is right. Reading is not just what you read, it is kind of a mixture of what you are already thinking of, how you imagine stuff, how you interrupt and last what is written.

Reading “How to kill a Mockingbird” for Harper Lee, I was captured by Scout’s first day at school. Scout is the main character and narrator of the story. She was 6 years old when the story started, and although the story is not about school at all, yet how was her first day at school just met my thoughts about homeschooling.

Before reading the book, I was thinking about how I need to read in many fields and get more knowledgeable, even about stuff that are not interesting to me if I am really considering homeschooling. It is not lovely if all my kids can speak all programming languages as their mum is a passionate computer engineer and for sure they wouldn’t speak French as I hate it. Then, I reminded myself that It is not like I will educate them everything, it is free-learning, yet yeah you need to be stronger and better than you are now.

For a moment, I felt this is too way risky. I mean, am I good enough for this?. I don’t want to regret this years later, if it turned out I wasn’t good enough for this. Then I went into reading, to read about Scout. Scout was a very intelligent girl, although it was her first day at school, she can read and write well. So her teacher, Miss Caroline, disliked that she can read!. And she told her to tell her father not to teach her any more, as it would interfere with her reading. Scout said that it wasn’t her father who taught her, and before she could express her self, Sout says:

Miss Caroline apparently thought I was lying. “Let’s not let our imaginations run away with us, dear,” she said. “Now you tell your father not to teach you any more. It’s best to begin reading with a fresh mind. You tell him I’ll take over from here and try to undo the damage-”

“Ma’am?”

“Your father does not know how to teach. You can have a seat now.”

So now Scout had to compromise, she simply started to feel guilty for her ability to read. She was like analyzing how she always read and she can’t remember how she was even taught this. and she said words I loved:

“Until I feared I would lose it, I never loved to read. One does not love breathing.”
Then after that she started to feel bored, so she began writing a letter for a friend of her named Dill in the story, when miss Caroline saw this, her comment was really bad.
Miss Caroline caught me writing and told me to tell my father to stop teaching me. “Besides,” she said. “We don’t write in the first grade, we print. You won’t learn to write until you’re in the third grade.”
This time Scout started to really blame Cal who educated her writing!.
Now, it was clear for me what’s wrong with Caroline. As I was a teacher before (Either Ensan or Being TA). Miss Caroline was taught how to teach a certain way and to a certain type of students. So she is not flexible, if you are not here according to her lesson plan, then she would be really nervous and she won’t know what to do. So she thrilled that one of her students can already read and write.
Much more, after that there was an issue happening regarding one of the other students. Scout loved to explain the condition of the other student so miss Caroline would understand whats wrong. Instead of thanking, she considered her annoying and she actually punished her.
I know, that perfectly, this is not how a first day at school is. I went to school, so I know how first day at school can be fun.
Another thing about her first day, her elder brother Jim. He explained that she can’t play with him, talk, or really interact as usual with him at school. As you know, this kind of fame people get at school. My sister is older than me by 2 years and she was at the same school, I remember when joining school, I was annoyed that I see her many times, yet I have to give her her space with her friends and not to just act normally like I do at home. So this part really clicked.

At this point, I was just feeling ‘I don’t want my kids to face this’.

I am pretty sure that I will teach my kids a lot, even if they were going to join school. I know that they should focus on one language in the beginning, to be book readers, to enjoy expressing themselves, to not just waste the whole morning in boring day, to go as fast they can. So if they reached grade 6 level in grade 1, I would be happy!. So why would I want them to live grade 1 level, if they are worth grade 3 level or anything different?.

Why would I put my kids in a place that would make them regret that they know!. And as a TA, I know this is happening!. Yes, It is not in this annoying way, but in a very similar way with same end results.

Also, The idea of that when Scout did something good in my point of view, she got punished!. So imagine trying to enrich your kid with all good morals, then he gets punished for it at school or taught an opposite thing?!. They would get a very contradicted personality.

I know, they need to face the world and learn to compromise, yet not at this age!. At this age, they are still building their personality.

When Scout’s Father, Atticus noticed there is something wrong. She told him that she didn’t feel well and she actually don’t want to go to school again. It turned out from their talk that Atticus was already home-schooled. So she asked him if he can teach her at home, just like her grandpa did with him. Yet, he explained that it can’t be as he got work and that it is forbidden by law to not go to school. He invited her to read together, she explained that she can’t even read ever again with him according to miss Caroline, and she told him everything happened in her day. At this moment, Atticus decided to make a deal with his kid, he told her she would compromise, and read as you want together, yet not to anyone at school.

So isn’t this mostly what we do in our modern communities?. We know current educational system is awful, yet we try to live with it!. So why would we really compromise with what we refuse, just because its law, if we can risk and do something we believe in?.

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